Usage Agreement and Terms

1. THE SITE "LEGNOG.COM" (HEREAFTER REFERRED TO AS "THE SITE") SETS THE FOLLOWING RULES, REGULATIONS, AGREEMENTS, AND TERMS WHICH APPLY TO ANY AND ALL VISITORS TO THE SITE, THEIR REPRESENTATIVES IN AN OFFICIAL OR UNOFFICIAL CAPACITY, ANY AND ALL AUTOMATIC OR MANUAL DATA-GATHERING PROGRAMS WHICH ACCESS THE INFORMATION STORED ON THE SITE, INCLUDING BROWSERS, WEB BOTS, OR ANY OTHER PROGRAM (HEREAFTER REFERRED TO AS "THE VIEWER").

2. THE VIEWER, THROUGH THE ACCESS OF THE SITE, INCLUDING VIEWING THE SITE THROUGH A BROWSER, AUTOMATED WEBPAGE-GATHERING PROGRAMMING OR ANY OTHER METHOD OF REPRODUCING THE CONTENT FROM THE SITE, MANUAL OR AUTOMATIC, IMPLICITLY AGREES TO THE TERMS STATED WITHIN, REGARDLESS OF ANY PREVIOUS REVIEW AND/OR KNOWLEDGE OF THIS AGREEMENT.

3. THE SITE, INCLUDING ANY AND ALL TEXT, GRAPHICS, PROGRAMMING, AND EXTERNAL PROMOTIONAL MATERIALS, INCLUDING FLYERS, STICKERS, T-SHIRTS, PLASTIC GEWGAWS, SONGS, PROMOTIONAL CONTESTS, JOKES, SLOGANS, AND MADE-UP WORDS, IS COMPLETELY COPYWRITED BY LEGNOG.COM, A WHOLLY OWNED SUBSIDIARY OF THE LEGNOG CONSORTIUM.

4. LICENSE IS GRANTED TO THE VIEWER AND ANY OR ALL OF THE ACQUAINTANCES OF THE VIEWER, INCLUDING RELATIVES, CO-WORKERS, FRIENDS, PASSERS-BY, ANCESTORS, DESCENDANTS, AND ANY AND ALL PEOPLE WHO HAVE EVER KNOWN OF THE VIEWERS' EXISTENCE. THIS LICENSE GRANTS THE VIEWER ACCESS TO THE INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY CONTAINED ON THE SITE, AS LONG AS THE INFORMATION CONTAINED THEREIN IS USED WITHIN THE PROSCRIBED INTELLECTUAL BOUNDARIES, AS OUTLINED WITHIN EACH ARTICLE. (IN THE CASES OF INFORMATION NOT BEING COVERED EXPLICITLY, THE VIEWER SHOULD CONSIDER THE INFORMATION NOT COVERED TO BE HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL, AND NOT FOR VIEWING, REPRODUCTION, OR DISCUSSION, BY THE VIEWER OR ANYONE KNOWN TO THE VIEWER, PAST, PRESENT, OR FUTURE.)

5. LEGNOG.COM ALSO HEREBY RETAINS ANY AND ALL RIGHTS TO ANY INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY THAT THE VIEWER MAY WORK ON, CREATE INDEPENDENTLY, OR OTHERWISE CONJURE UP, DURING ANY TIME, PAST, PRESENT, OR FUTURE. THIS INCLUDES ANY AND ALL WRITING, DRAWING, CARVING, POTTERY, SCRIMSHAW, MACRAME, BREAKDANCING ROUTINES, BODY MODIFICATIONS, APPALACHIAN "SONG STORYIN'", CAT-MOULDING, EGG-BENDING, FACE-PULLING, RANDY-NEWMAN-IMPERSONATING, CREDIT-CARD-FOLDING, SADIE-HAWKINS-SKINNING, NEIL-DIAMOND-FLENSING, QUARTER-SWALLOWING, FISH-FLAPPING, CHEESE-TAUNTING, GARGOYLE-BALANCING, MIME-SLAPPING, DOG-WORRYING, AND CERTAIN KINDS OF LANDERS-SISTERS-MOCKING. (FOR A COMPLETE LIST OF LANDERS-SISTERS-MOCKING COVERED BY THIS AGREEMENT, PLEASE REQUEST DOCUMENT G-LG-000591 FROM THE OFFICE OF LANDERS-SISTERS-MOCKING, DEPT. L, 1500 J STREET NW, WASHINGTON, DC, 20001. ENCLOSE $4.95 POSTAGE AND HANDLING, AND A QUARTER FOR BILLY, THE STOCKBOY. HE'S THE BREADWINNER OF HIS FAMILY, AND A LITTLE EXTRA ALWAYS HELPS, IF YOU CATCH MY POINT.)

6. LEGNOG.COM IS HEREBY HELD EXEMPT FROM ANY AND ALL LITIGATION TAKEN BY ANY VIEWER. LEGNOG.COM IS GRANTED EMINENT DOMAIN OVER EVERY PROPERTY EVER HELD, PAST, PRESENT, AND FUTURE. LEGNOG.COM IS HEREBY GRANTED SUPREME POWER OVER ALL THE ANIMAL KINGDOM, THE MYSTICAL POWERS OF THE ELDER GODS, AND A FUNKY SOUL. LEGNOG.COM IS, WAS, AND ALWAYS SHALL BE, FOREVER AND EVER, AMEN.

BY PRESSING THIS BUTTON, I SIGNIFY THAT I AM IN FACT A WHOLLY OWNED SUBSIDIARY OF THE LEGNOG CONSORTIUM, AND SUBJECT TO ALL PENALTIES, REGULATIONS, FINES, TARRIFFS, WHIPPINGS, AND MISCELLANEOUS ACTS OF WHIMSICAL DEGRADATION THAT THE SITE DEEMS NECESSARY AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT.